5/1/2022

It was a long journey to 100 miles. 7 trail days but in real days it took like 17. Some stretches of 100 miles was harder than others. This first 100 was probably the most difficult of my whole trail.

-Woke at 7:40 am. Slow morning at campsite.
-Start hiking 8:55 am.
–Dreams last night in between looking at the stars. Saw some big shooters.
Lunch @ Barrel Springs. Tuna Wrap, 1 bacon ranch & 1 Honey BBQ (real good!) w/ Sour Cream & Onion Lays
–Talked to NH Pete.
–Camping at San Ysidiro Creek. Soaked feet w Steph “Holiday” and Jewelie (spelling prolly wrong)
I was going to keep hiking on this day. I was talking it up to other people out there, “oh yea probably do a bit more miles.” I didn’t. I remember sitting on a rock in the sun on the far side of the creek. I smiled and talked to passing hikers. I felt at great peace next to the running water. Hydration and a distracting noise to drown out my thoughts. So I just never moved and ended up sleeping right there.

Today was up and down. 10 miles to water in the morning. Had service and called Delaney, I needed to talk to her about her time saying goodbye to Gran EB. They sang camp songs and laughed and had a good time.
It’s still hard as a I process this. I’ve needed to reach out to people when I have service. I need connection right now. With Gran EB and others around her. I feel disconnected out here. From my family, friends and the trail. But out here, there’s no better place, and this is where Gran EB wants me to be so I am here.

This is the first iteration of the poem below. I’d rewrite it many times throughout my journey. I knew a line hit when I’d cry writing it. Soft, I know.

When she dies, I’m gonna walk 100 miles.
I’m gonna cry as I walk
And miss her everystep
When I find myself at the top
Of the tallest mountain
When I stand before a river crossing
in a few steps my feet will be wet
When I come to that fork in this trail
I’ll tell myself she told me
To keep walking

(I cried a lot writing this ^)

Maize, when I left the trail to say goodbye to Gran EB I had to lean on you. And you held me up. I will always cherish you for that.

Donald, I already knew what was going to happen when I dialed your number. As soon as you could, you’d be there for me. And you were.

I learned how important realtionships are in my life. The connections I formed that I could rely on, from people who loved me. Being there for people you love, that’ important.

Day 5/1: Camp at mile 105
5/2: 120
5/3: 137
5/4: 152
5/5: 170
5/6 (half day): 180 (Idyllwild)
Shopping list for Warren Springs: 1 Lunch, 2 dinner, 1 snack (possible lunch at Warner Springs and Paradise Valley Cafe)